Thursday, November 4, 2010
The Gray Divorce
An article called The Gray Divorce discusses how more and more couples who have been married for three to four decades decide to get a divorce. This shocking and unexpected news has been a growing phenomenon for the past ten years. Money and marriage are the main sources people expect to gain to make them happiest. Romantic love, even if money is involved, becomes harder to have is there is not a deeper attachment in the relationship. The author says that marriages fall apart later in life because the couple suffers from an emptiness in their spirituality and a lack of sharing a passion. If a couple gets married and do not become soulmates, they will end up as roommates. More women ask for the divorce than men. Men only ask for divorce if they have a replacement. The women who seek a divorce later in life when they realize they have been living in an unsatisfying relationship for many years and their fantasy for freedom they have been thinking about for many years has come out possibly from a flirtatious conversation. Women usually think that I am only 60 years old, I am feeling great, and I have a chance for real love, revived sex, or a chance to explore life on my own.
When I read this article I thought about how a lot of times after the kids leave the house, the couple no longer has the same commonalities that they held on to throughout their entire marriage which were their kids. I also thought of how a relationship with Christ can fill all of a person's voids in their life that nothing else on the earth can do, even a marriage. Larry Crabb in the book Connecting talks about how a unity is formed in the body of Christ and how powerful connecting with other humans is that can even change lives. Maybe these couples are not communicating with each other and Crabb believes that through talking, souls can be restored. We are taught to love one another like Christ loves the church. If a married couple are not seeking God as the center of their lives, Christ cannot manifest in the marriage which can cause each spouse to view the marriage differently than what was intended by Christ.