Saturday, March 26, 2011

When little Hurt People attempt to Hurt bigger People Goes Wrong

What you have just viewed is scary for anyone to view numerous times. This video shows what appears to be an innocent pre-teen being bullied by a peer. Throughout grade school, most of us have either experienced or witnessed bullying of some sort. Bullying has become an everyday hobby for some kids. In fact, it is estimated that nearly 160,000 are absent from school each day for fear of encountering a bully. Here in America, 2.1 million bullies are enrolled in school and 2.7 million are labeled victims. If we break these numbers down further, it yields, 1 out of 7 students are either a bully or a victim.

Dr. Sandra Wilson wrote a book entitled, Hurt People, Hurt People. Although it is a rather catchy phase, those four words hold more truth than one could imagine. In this video clip, it is clear to see that the phrase is applicable to both students. For the sake of the blog, I will refer to the smaller boy as “Mini Me” and the bigger boy as “Mikey”. According to the book (Chapter 6), Wilson provides three questions that every human asks and answers repeatedly: Can I Be Safe, Can I Be Me, and Can I Be Accepted? The response to the first question typically involves trust. As we mature learning to trust others can be detrimental to our social development. In regards to the second question, the “show” and “tell” factor is presented. The basic premise I child being able to be themselves without judgment being passed. The final question simply searches for acceptance which is an innate characteristic of all humans.

Without a doubt, Mini Me has issues that could stem from several places (i.e home, school, church). Because he is hurting, he feels the need to hurt others. In turn, this behavior could potentially make his pain temporarily go away. On the other hand, Mikey is a victim in this situation. His motivation to hurt someone else was out of fear and self-defense, however, this does not excuse his behavior. Instead, Dr. Wilson presents a simple two-step process. This equation is New Choices plus Consistent Practice, yields Change! It is the responsibly of those around both young men to ensure that better choices are made and that a change in there thinking pattern is achieved. I fear that if changes do not happen, next time a “Mini Me” will be dead, while a “Micky” is incarcerated.

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